just do it

Competition is a loaded word for those of us who have children. It must be used carefully in mixed company. Let me explain the two sides to the debate.

First side. All competition is bad and wounding to the soul. It's wrong for us to compare ourselves to each other since we are all unique individuals. Competition kills proactive creativity and friendship.

Flip side. Competition is a healthy part of our society. It encourages people to be better, work harder, and gain an edge.

Recently I've noticed something interesting sitting on the sidelines of many Saturday morning soccer and horseback events. Extreme competition, not from the competitors but from the mentors, parents, coaches, trainers, and instructors. Those are the ones with fierce competitive streaks. The ones screaming on the sidelines and scolding children after the game or show class.

When I witness this competition gone awry I wonder why the screamer doesn't enter into the arena. If they could do it so much better why don't they do it? Why don't they put themselves out there for all the world to judge and critique. Why don't they try their best and have their best not be good enough?

Because it's easy to sit on the sidelines of life not and not participate. Everyone is a critic very few have the guts to take a risk and do it. Those who have participated are seasoned with a hefty dose of humbleness. Not only have they seen the glory of victory but experienced the desolation of defeat.

Today my son, Eagle aka Jake, and his team finished their soccer season undefeated. Not once did their coach scream, yell or throw an adult temper tantrum. He praised more often than he corrected and his team thrived. Well done Mr. Johnson, you are the best coach any kid could ask for.

This morning, Simi my daughter, exceeded all expectations (mine and hers) and placed first and third in her horseback classes. Watching her courage and confidence made the mommy pride soar.

Then I entered in horseback classes and did okay except for one class. When I exited the arena my daughter was already holding my fifth place ribbon with a huge smile on her face and told me "Fifth place is the best because the ribbon is beautiful pink. Blue ribbons aren't that nice. Great job, Mommy."

It brought tears to my eyes because I've said that to her. Because her best will always be good enough for me and my best is good enough for her.

I wonder if the screamers in life were ever shown graciousness or encouragement when their best wasn't good enough for a trophy or blue ribbon. Did their coach, parent, or instructor ever tell them that 5th place is acceptable?

Somewhere in the middle is where I fall in the competition spectrum. I will put my self 'out there' but any score, time or ribbon doesn't define me. The same goes for my kids. Good job J and Simi. I couldn't be anymore happy with you. Not because you did well but because you are brave and courageous to try.

Not many just show up and try.